...ramblings of a crazy mind
Monday, October 11, 2004
I ABHOR farewells.

Guess that’s not such an exceptional thing. Pretty normal you’d say.

But I ABHOR farewells with an intensity that’s scary. Especially when it revolves around my sister..my akka. Then I totally and completely, unquestionably, lose it. (not that I ever had it, but...)

Those are the times when I, an anti-war – ANYWHERE – person suddenly starts wishing, rather fervently I might add, that the powers that be declare the 3rd world war. Combat crazy (welll, loving to inflict it!) bush decides to attack yet another country. Or that there is a hurricane. Resulting in all flights into and outta India being cancelled. Indefinitely.

Why? So that my sis, my akka, won’t be able to fly. Leaving me.

I hate it when she does that. Absolutely DETEST it.

She left Sunday night (India time) - now you know why the launch didn’t happen over the weekend as planned. I was too busy being stuck like a limpet to her. My apologies. The coming weekend the launch WILL happen. I'd also like to urge my 'non-indian' pals to encourage more of their friends to join up - the event is currently VERY dominated by Indians! :)

will leave you with something from akka's 1991 (she was 17 at the time) diary - sorry akka for not taking ur permission (dont know whether u wrote it..) - came home and couldn't fall asleep, so i rooted through her things, chanced upon her ol diary - n though i know i shouldn't have - read it - this is the 3rd entry in it

When we think of loss we think of loss through death of people we love. But loss is a far more encompassing theme in our life. For we not only lose through death but also by leaving and being left, by changing and letting go and moving on. And our losses include not only our separations and departures from those we love but our conscious and unconscious losses of romantic dreams, impossible expectations, illusions of freedom and powerful illusion of safety - and the loss of our younger self - the self that thought it would always be unwrinkled and invincible and immortal. These losses are necessary because we grow by losing and leaving and letting go and by growing we begin to mature and learn every day.

i STILL _abhor_ farewells.

(PEOPLE : _PLEASE_ use the NEW comments box - haloscan is eating up all my previous comments!! _PLEASE_ DO _NOT_ use that box any more - even non-blogspot users can use the new comments box. PLEASE dont help haloscan eat up my memories!!!)
use ME!!!
k : i hate goodbyes. you say it much better though!
me : ahem! i doubt that sincerly... u write beautifully! dont we all hate goodbyes! why must we part, at all?

paul : Wow, that was well written. I too hate goodbyes, but I've done them so often, I've learned to harden my heart. IS that bad?
me : ok, a second compliment to this post - must be marginally better then the normal drivel i subject u people too! ;o)
harden your heart? have u REALLY managed to do that, or do u simply "bury" the feelings u r not comfortable with? i dunno.. am on a limb here - but i believe u r more the types who has a gazillion feelings - but allows himself to acknowledge only the ones he knows won't make him vulnerable...
whatever the case, u r one of the few men whose thoughts i do not dismiss

Bitter Chocolate : I ABHOR farewells too!! and Hence, HELLO:D...nice blog.
me : hey there! Don't we ALL!! :) nice to see ya here! do visit often...
nishant : ahem...those were heavy words...

and one does wonder that if we have to grow by losing then why grow up at all?

me : lol, that is a dead give away that u work at a CALL center btb!! :P
if u know a trick that prevents one from growing up - DO let me know!!

thaughts unlimited : hey...been reading ur blog ..but commenting for the first time nice place u got
me : hmmm! why no comments prior to this?!?! :P :P :P
thank u for ur kind words bout my humble blog
Angel Floral : the angel was here?! WOW!! hey angel - if u cud help incorporate the personalisation of the "angle has spoken...._ _ _ _" (person's name) for my site, it would be awesome!
n abso love the way u can come up with a ryhme any ol time! ;)
thank u for the hug!

Miss Swizz : goodbye _SUX_!!! u said it babe!!...been down the road of not believing they've actually happened untill MUCH later - cannot fully accept my sis no longer lives with us - n its been 4 YEARS - the home feels "right" only when she is there too
as for the not feeling too much... well the problem with that is just that - not feeling too much. including the GOOD things :)
i want secret santa to launch just as badly!! :)
Hi sweetheart,
You know what I feel ... I said it all in my mail. I miss you soooo much. You've got to come here soon. Btw, you are forgiven for reading my diary. I think I did write that para but couldn't vouch to it. If I didn't write something like "These words written by so and so, really express what I mean to say" kind of thing, before or after it, it's usually mine. Love ya tons,
Hey there Pramila..a well written post I must say..Well I Hate Farewells too..But I would also like to see it in a diff way...BEING THERE WITH THEM TILL THE SEC THEY LEAVE...get to see them that extra bit;)
Peace and thanx for droppin into my world..Cya around more:) keep smilin
My first comment...

Farewells arent sweet at all....but we need to get along with, as there will be more and more farewells all along the journey of life...

I shud say, I can _now_ quite easily get over the hangover of farewells ! Maybe me just became a lil less sensitive...dunno...maybe just !!
Milaaa.. sorry couldnt pick up your call.. was in a meeting.. :( cant call you meself.. no balance in the darned cell :((

hows u??????
I hate goodbyes, but i LOVE hello's! and you can't have one without the other. . . .
Hi hon. Boo... lousy times, huh? You know, it's not that Haloscan eats up your comments, it just doesn't show the number of comments after a while, but they're still there!
Akka : your mail was beautiful. i hope that some day i can write like u.. though it doesnt seem very likely..
thank u for the forgiveness!:D you are the BEST!! ...n i thought as much - that the para was written by you.. cause the para before it said Erma Brombeck - but not this one...
love u n MISSSS u!!
wonder if my comments r appearing?!
For some reason Freeservers is showing your site as 'Domain Available' Weird huh?
I hate goodbyes too... I'd so much rather be the one who was going!
it does?! thats worrisome!! i have to get that investigated!!!
hey babe, thanks for the updated link! will reply your email soon.

(from LittleNomad.com)
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