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...ramblings of a crazy mind
Friday, December 29, 2006
Fresh takes
Hello people!

The reason I haven't been showing my face in these parts is the test was an unmitigated debacle.

No wait.

Misplaced modifier.

My performance on the test was an unmitigated debacle.

Buttt all is not lost. I can – and I will – take the test again *shudder* and this time I will ace it.

Hopefully.

No, I will.

Ok, for while this is going to become the place I come to moan about study woes. Anyone with ideas on how someone who hasn’t touched math in 10 years should go about preparing for it (my basics are ridiculously shaky) – other than going at it for 18 hours a day – gimme a shout.

Also anyone else interested in taking the test – Jan / Feb time frame – maybe we could push each other to study – this will probably work best if you live in Bombay (close to thane would be awesome!)

In other news – health front seems to be getting better though the damn pseudo arthritis (resultant of all the heavy, resistant, medication I am on) is still there.

2007…hopefully this will be a much nicer year!

A belated merry x’mas and a ‘Appy New Year to all!!
Saturday, December 09, 2006
Na tum humen jaano... na hum tumen jaane... magar lagta hai kuch aise mera humdum mil gaya
To come back and have empty wall resonate with past voices.

To feel like every time you turn around you, you just missed seeing him.

To think that if only you had turned a second sooner, you would have seen him.

To be able to still feel his presence, smell him around you, hear his voice, almost able to see him...
...and yet not.

And not know why.

No wait, to not want to accept why.

Is this really it?

Will I never, ever, see him again?

Really?

Why?

Everytime I walk through the house, his house, I have the overwhelming urge to scream out "appa"...as if this time he will respond.. this time I will realise it was all a baddd dream, much like the ones I had as a kid.
ones I used to wake him up for. And cry over. And have him tell me "don't be silly!"

yee raat yee chandni phir kahan... sun ja dil ki dastan...

one of his fav songs is playings and inexplixably I feel totally bereft...and closer to him at the same time.

I know there will come a day when I don't mourn him, atleast so painfully.

But that day isn't here yet.

Love you, dad.

Always and forever.

Happy birthday daddy.

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In other news I'm taking THE exam on the 14th of Dec 2006 finally. Hopefully things will go well for me - wish me luck, and loads of it!! :)