...ramblings of a crazy mind
Saturday, October 11, 2008
Phir Dekhiye/Rock On

Aankhon Mein Jis Ke Koi To Khwab Hai
Khush Tha Wahin Jo Thoda Betaab Hai
Zindagi Mein Koi Arzoo Kijiye
Phir Dekhiye......

Hoton Pe Jis Ke Koi To Geet Hai
Woh Haare Bhi To Us Ki Hi Jeet Hai
Dil Mein Jo Geet Hai Gun Guna Lijiye
Phir Dekhiye......

Yaadon Mein Jis Ke Kisi Ka Naam Hai
Sapno Ke Jaise Us Ki Har Sham Hai
Koi To Aaj Se Apna Dil Dijiye
Phir Dekhiye......

Khwab Bhun Yeh Zara Geet Sun Yeh Zara
Phool Chun Yeh Zara
Phir Dekhiye......

...will I ever write, REALLY write, again?!
....It's as pure and simple as that.
I love you.
It's not a weight you must carry around.

I love you.
It's not a box that holds you in.

I love you.
It's not a standard you have to bear.

I love you.
It's not a sacrifice I make.

I love you.
It's not a pedestal you are frozen upon.

I love you.
It's not an expectation of perfection.

I love you.
It's not my life's whole purpose (or your's).

I love you.
It's not to make you change.

I love you.
It's not even to make you love me.

I love you.
It's as pure and simple as that.

- Anonymous
Monday, October 06, 2008
I just got royally...well, ahem.... "corporated" is the term I'm going to use (instead of the one beating like a drum in my head*). Someone else just took all the credit for my efforts, happily - right before my eyes. And I could do nothing. Nothing except stare in shock and horror that someone could be so low. Oh, yea.. that and fend questions from everyone around me going "But Pramila!! how can they!?!" As though I have any controll!


Another phrase comes to mind : Welcome to Reuters.

And what a welcome it is. Once again.

A part of me is pertified that someone might stumble across this post and get me into more trouble.

Another part of me (the one that makes me, 'me' I guess) _wants_ that to happen. Want to be asked what in the name of god do I mean - and then have to show them everything (I've proof - as always. You didn't think this was the first time it was happening to me, didja!).

Buttt, it will probably never, ever happen. Have gotten "corporated" enough times over the past one year to know that this is "normal" where I work, especially in this particular team.

K sera sera... the futures not ours to see.

* SCREWED for the naive (read DUMB) ones.
Thursday, October 02, 2008
The world of high finance
Those who have stumbled on to this page hoping to find something about the recent melt down in the us/globe - I'm sorry. this is _NOT_ going to help you in any way (unless you want a smile or two that is)


It has been so long since I wrote anything.

Well anything of interest / personal in nature that is. Lengthy treatise at work continue unabated. There was a time I wrote separate diaries, blogs, occasional long emails to family/friends and even the odd postal letter to the then best friend.



Hmmm. Dunno.

Don’t feel it though.

Recently read (devoured?) the book “almost single” – nothing fabulous, and in that lies its genius-ness. At least for me.

Someone I had met in passing, at a party for less than 15 mins read it – and took the trouble to call me and tell me about it (and pass it on!) – saying the book and the central character reminded her immensely of me! (Dunno if it’s a compliment or... Especially considering what she knows about my love life could fit on the back of a postage stamp and there'd still be a hellava lot of space on it!) ;)

However on reading it, I must say it _DOES_ bear a scary resemblance to me and my life. Other than the fact that my days are gobbled by the world of finance, where there is zero tending to negative scope of tall, intelligent, sensitive, good looking men of course!
(...imagining stumbling onto someone I've met through work in the buff...eeewwww!! I just might need therapy after that.)

Buttt having stated the obivious lack of interesting (read potential) men at work - I am learning a lot about the financial world - a lot of which is faciniating. Foreign Exchange is an amazing place to be in currently and money market is nothing to scoff at either right now. Having the Indian teams of both, in a VERY large finanical services company reporting into me certainly affords the opportunity to learn a lot. Having access to high profile traders in the dealing rooms of every single big (and small and state run for that matter!) bank/brokeage firm in the country opens up so many, many avenues to LEARN - something I'm totally capitalising on.
Who knows, in a couple of years yours truly could be on the otherside of this information sale (am currently on what is called "sell side" of information - and the traders/investment bankers etc are on the "buy side")

And who knows... one of these gentleman just *might* be like Karan (_NOT_ my ex-boss Karan - the Karan from Kala's book - Almost single)